Throughout the Gospel of Mark, Jesus is constantly asking people not to tell others about him. From chapter 1 in which he drove out demons and “would not let the demons speak because they knew who he was,” (Mark 1:34) and throughout his ministry, Jesus warns those heals and who witnesses the miracles he performs not to tell anyone. When Peter identified Jesus as Messiah in chapter 8, “Jesus warned them not to tell anyone about him.”
Scholars have theories about why Jesus might have wanted to keep his identity as Messiah and his miraculous abilities a secret. Maybe he was trying to keep from getting arrested. Maybe he was teaching the disciples a new way to be a hero without flaunting one’s powers. Maybe the whole thing was a retcon to explain why the disciples hadn’t talked about Jesus much before.
Whatever the reason, it is pretty clear that in the Gospel of Mark, Jesus is trying really hard to keep his identity under wraps. And it is pretty clear that those around him didn’t really respect his wishes. After healing a mute and deaf man, the author tells us:
“Jesus commanded them not to tell anyone. But the more he did so, the more they kept talking about it. People were overwhelmed with amazement. ‘He has done everything well,’ they said. ‘He even makes the deaf hear and the mute speak.'” (Mark 7:36-37)
By his own estimation, Jesus was not ready for the world to know about him yet. He made himself vulnerable to his disciples, showed his true self to a few people around him, hoping that they would honor and respect his request for privacy. But that wish was not granted. Those people to whom Jesus showed himself were “overwhelmed with amazement” and gossiped about this guy with unbelievable powers to all their friends.
Whatever the reason for Jesus wanting to keep his identity hidden, what I take from this is that Jesus understands the experience of LGBTQ+ individuals who are in the closet. You might not want everyone to know about your true self yet. The reason for that is nobody’s business but your own. You alone have the right to decide who to tell, and how, and when. And Jesus gets it. He wasn’t ready for everyone to know he was God yet. He gets the need for privacy. He gets the need for patience and timing.
If anyone tries to pressure you into leaving the closet before you are ready, if any of the few people you have been vulnerable with abuse that, take some comfort in the closeted God who gets it and will sit in the closet with you for as long as you need.
Neglected Word 